Purge
by jnovak428
Summary: Destiel drabble. Benny knows what's up when Dean and Cas finally reunite and leave them alone to work things out.


**A/N: **Hi! Wrote this in the fall, right now I'm just uploading my old stuff so I'll be up to date. Hopefully my writing skills have progressed since then.

I do not own Supernatural or its characters.

* * *

Benny stopped walking and turned around to face Dean and Castiel.

"Look, I understand that y'all just had a sentimental reunion. You've got a lotta catchin' up to do. I can take a hint."

Dean peered at him, confused. "What are you talkin' about?"

Benny gave a short sigh and rolled his eyes a little, as if he were attempting to communicate with children. "You two are fallin' so hard you can't even feel the ground beneath your feet." He shifted and his face softened, remembering his lost love, Andrea. "I seen that look before. It's somethin' I had once but ain't never gon' have again."

Benny glanced between Dean and Cas, who lingered behind the hunter watching them both pensively, neither knowing how to respond to a statement so forthcoming.

"Alright, well I'll be back in a couple of hours, try not to have too much fun while I'm gone."

He leaned towards Dean and whispered, "You're welcome, brother," patting him on the shoulder. He winked and set off into the woods.

Dean began to stutter, "I-I-don't know what he's…talking…abo-" but trailed off when he turned and his eyes settled on Cas. The angel's filthy trenchcoat and scruffy beard made him appear like a lost puppy, searching longingly for an owner. Dean's shoulders fell, a pained expression on his face.

"Dean… I think we should talk about this."

Conflicted and vulnerable, he went into defense mode and replied accusingly, "Talk about what, Cas?"

Cas hesitated guiltily, biting his lip. He gazed at Dean, standing ready to receive an answer. He wished they were closer. Now it felt as if he were confessing for the whole of Purgatory to hear.

"Our true feelings towards each other."

In that moment Dean's frustration melted. After what seemed like an eternity, he took a nervous, jagged breath and said, "Ok."

* * *

"Come on."

Dean motioned to Cas, and they sat down beside each other on a rock along the bank of the brook running through the woods. They both stared out at the water for a few moments. Finally Cas began.

"Dean… you've taught me what it's like to be human. To value emotions over reason, to be passionate, to find something worth fighting for to the end. I have lived a very long time, but until I met you these things were foreign to me. I know how to feel because of you, Dean. You freed me from a world I never knew I was enslaved to."

He looked at Dean, who returned his gaze. Dean saw it was his turn. He sighed.

"Y'know, maybe you've noticed, but I'm not my biggest fan. There's been times when I was ready to give it all up, 'cause I didn't think I was worth the fight. Then you came along and dragged me outta Hell and told me _I deserved to be saved_. You were the first person to tell me that, or at least the first one I believed it from."

He chuckled, then gave Cas a look of pure sincerity.

"I have a hard time telling people how I really feel about them. I know it's 'cause of the way Dad brought me up, y'know, keep it in, make 'em think you're ok when really on the inside your world's falling to pieces."

Tears were welling up in Dean's eyes now as he tried to compose himself but couldn't.

"There's these three little words, that all this time I was hoping you knew, just so I wouldn't have to say 'em."

He searched himself for the courage to continue.

"I know it shouldn't be this burden, I don't wanna keep it locked away, but it's just so hard to get the words out."

Dean was choking up, his eyes stinging. This was the culmination of a lifetime of feeling unworthy of something sacred.

"Cas, I…I…"

Castiel could stand this struggle no longer and ended Dean's pain once and for all.

"I love you, Dean."

Dean exhaled deeply, the weight of the world lifted from him. Now there was no delay in his reply.

"I love you Cas. I love you so Goddamn much. I'm just sorry I didn't have the guts to tell you sooner."

Castiel gripped Dean firmly by the shoulders and looked him square in the face.

"The only one you should be apologizing to is yourself, Dean, for ever thinking you don't deserve happiness."

Upon hearing the truth Dean broke down, and Cas was there to catch him. He gazed down at the man in his arms who gave his life a purpose, one which he had finally fulfilled. It reminded him of a saying he saw long ago on a bumper sticker, back some time he was riding in the Impala: 'Make love, not war.'

He thought of his brothers and sisters who cast him out for feeling sentiment towards a human. He pitied them, for he knew what angels were truly meant to do; protect and love their Father's ultimate creation. He had planned to stay in this place forever, to pay his dues for all the ways he had made others suffer. But this, this made him reconsider. Just then Dean, cheeks wet and hands trembling, reached up and pulled Cas into a long kiss. Falling back, he said, "You don't know how long I've wanted to do that."

Smiling tenderly, Cas replied, "You don't know how long I've waited for you to be ready to do that."

They sat quietly, watching the water flow freely along the path it has made for itself, finally feeling that once they left this place, the future was theirs to decide.

* * *

Benny returned some time later, entering the forest clearing hesitantly. He grinned at what he saw. Dean and Castiel sat together on a boulder at the stream's edge. Cas's head lay nestled on the hunter's shoulder, Dean's arm around the angel, keeping him close. Benny knew better than to interrupt the one moment of tranquility they've gotten in this unholy place. He was glad he could do good for somebody else; it gave him hope for himself.


End file.
